Plot Synopsis: A new kid at school must battle a vicious gang when he falls for the leaders girlfriend
Sixteen Candles, and Weird Science crap, this is where its at. Sex,
violence, sleaze, and a bad guy who looks like David Hess's son. Oh yea,
it stars James Spader, and Robert Downey Jr.
Tuff Turf centers around Morgan Hiller, played by James Spader.
He comes from a rich family, who for one reason or another, are now poor.
See his dad lost his job, and they had to move to the hood. They never
said what his dad used to do, but now he's a cab driver. Which brings me
to wonder, could his dad not have gotten a cab driver job back where they lived
before? So Spader rides around the seedy parts of town at night on his 10
speed bike, guess his dad sold his car, when he stumbles across Little David
Hess's gang robbing some old guy. Morgan breaks it up and peddles
off, so he can go home and get some sleep before his first day at a new school.
See where this is going yet?
Well when he peddles into his new school, who do we see also attends?
Yes David Hess Jr.'s gang. Hess Jr. is actually Nick, the leader of a
tough street gang that runs the school. Not much of a gang. he just
has three other members, and his smoking hot 80's slut style girlfriend.
So Morgan meets Robert Downey Jr in class and the two become best
friends. Downey even invites Morgan to see his band play later that
night. As the two BFF's are leaving Nick and his gang spray paint Morgan,
and smash his bike. Morgan doesn't seem to care as he's busy staring at
Nicks slut Frankie. Bad choice in names. I went to school with a
girl named Frankie. She was a fat bag of yeast. Ugly as a
CHUD. But this chick is hot.
So later Morgan steals a car and drives off to see Downey's band play.
In a cool twist, all the music is from Jim Carrol Band. Can you guess who
shows up as well? That's right Nicks gang. They don't see Morgan at
first, as hes busy dancing with Frankie. 80's dancing baby. You
know where everyone is dancing completely in sync. Well they grab Morgan,
beat him down, and steal his car. Problem is, he stole the car in the
first place, so Nick and his gang get pulled over and arrested for car theft.
This was just a dumb scene though, as nick and his boys already had a
Seeing as how Nick and his boys are sitting in jail, Morgan decides to start
romancing Frankie. He picks her up in Nicks car, see the guy never should
have left it parked by that club, and takes her to a country club, then a jazz
bar. I have to say this was a huge slow down to the film. It goes
on for like 20minutes, and is just very boring. But the action picks up
when Nick and boys trap Morgan in the locker room at school, and beat the shit
out of him. Its actually a cool scene. they take towels and load
then up with locks, then just whip the shit out of him.
Later that night Nick proposes to Frankie, and as he looks like David Hess,
she has no choice but to say yes. So when Morgan finds out about this, he
does what any man would do. He asks her to have dinner with him at his
parents house. Yea, sounds dumb, but its going somewhere, See Nick
and his guys see her there, and when she leaves they ask he to help them rob some
shmuck, like they were doing in the opening scene. She says yes, until
the shmuck in question is Morgan's dad. She freaks out, so Nick and his
guys attack. Well, its not much of an attack. Morgan's dad actually
beats the shit out of all of them until Nick shoots him. Whoich
makes me wonder, if a 50 year old fat guy can beat the crap out of all of these
guys, why was everyone afraid of them?
She calls Morgan from the hospital to tell him what happened, and
rather then stay by his dads bedside he takes her home to have sex with
her. 80's sex. You know where you hear the slow music as the girl
gets naked, then you see a few random sex scene shots before it fades out and
you have to uses your imagination. Well Nick sees this, which proves he
has no life and just sits outside Morgans house and watches him, and flips
out. He beats down Frankie's dad, and smacks the shit out of her as
well. Then he calls Morgan, and tells him to meet him at the warehouse in
20 minutes. I wonder how Morgan knew what warehouse to go to.
Anyway Morgan shows up, and the 80's fight ensues, with Morgan
holding his own until Nicks gang grabs him. Just as Nick is going to
shoot him, Robert Downey Jr. shows up with two doberman pincher's and evens the
odds. So Nick, and Morgan have, what is actually a cool fight scene that
features, swinging from a rope, a board with nails, an axe, a gun, and a fair
amount of blood. Not only does Morgan win, he actually kills Nick, then
takes Frankie to the jazz club as the credits play.
Great film. Spader was actually a bad ass pretty boy.
Robert Downey is fantastic in everything. Kim Richards, as Frankie cant act,
but who cares. She was hot. And Paul Mones as Nick was effective, based
on the fact he looked like David Hess's son. The soundtrack is good, and
I love that fact its not your typical 80's high school film. Its pretty
hardcore in spots. Highly recommended.
Overall 3 out of 5 Stars